Heart beat.

The look on his face was serious yet loving
busy yet patient, tough but so consoling.
I knew this man six months now,
But today his smile told a story worth a thousand words.
Losing a loved one was hard but the loss of a child- who could bear?

Maybe I never prayed enough, maybe my faith stumbled,
Should I have trusted and believed a bit more?

But whose fault was it?..mine?
And now, it was too late and the grief was mine to bear.
I held my belly as if to rekindle the life it once boasted.
I desired those loving kicks, I needed her to move.
I wanted her heart to beat!

I needed him to say all was well and I was just being paranoid.
But that look on his face, the way my doctor looked at me…
And he didn’t even say a word.

But his silence was worth a thousand words.
The loss of a child- who could bear?

I felt my legs go numb, my feet started to wiggle and his silence was sharper than a blade.
But whose fault was it?..his?

My joy was crushed in one split second, my dreams taken from within me.
I wanted to scream, I needed to cry.
But one question, ” what song was I to cry?”
I needed someone to teach me how to mourn, because this was a new kind of pain.

Yet outside the room , the birds chirped and sang.
The sun had dazzled into a beautiful golden banner.

But here in this little room, it was dark.
My heart went numb and my soul was a different shade of black,
It was deeper, darker, stronger and intense- it was the deepest dark I had ever felt.
The loss of a child- who could bear?
But whose fault was it?..God?

My little girl taken from me before she could even be,
Mummy’s favorite girl, my little ballerina.

Today should have been dark, but it wasn’t.
Today should have been dark, but the sun glistened- I curse the sun for smiling on today.

Today should have been gloomy, but the birds chose to sing.
I guess they sang my pain away!!!

For more great poetry, check out the link below
A pornstars cry

For assistance and support concerning grief visit;

griefshare
grief

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